I don't know why but I'm having a hard time writing this post. I've started over several times and end up deleting each attempt. There are so many things I could write about Lilly that it becomes overwhelming and at the same time I have such a depth of feeling for her that it's hard to articulate it on a blog. It's too public. I've tried to write about how good she is and how kind but I don't really think I can do it justice. There's just something about my Lilly, from her name to her delicate frame to her bright eyes that makes me feel like I'm the luckiest mom in the world and that I don't always deserve her.
I'll share this: Kelly and I haven't ever found out the sex of our babies. The surprise of it all is something I had always looked forward to. We were unsure of a boy's name, although Finn was my top pick, and we had a few girls' names that we liked. While talking on the phone with my sister, she mentioned the name Lilly. At the sound of that name my whole body got chills and I knew it was the one. I told Kelly and he, too, knew that would be the name for our baby if it was a girl. For me it was a profoundly spiritual experience finding the right name to match our little girl's spirit and Lilly was it. I also had dreams about Lillybefore she was born. I had a dream of what it would be like to touch her for the first time and when I did touch her little body on my chest it was the same magical sensation I had dreamt of...and then she screamed for the next three months.
Please stay tuned for another installment tomorrow and I'll try to be more light-hearted!
1 comment:
I love the name Lilly - in fact, it was one of our top choices for little Madilyn. Anyway, you really do know how to articulate your thoughts well; I love reading your blog. I too know what it is like having screaming babies; but in the end, it is all worth it. Lilly is darling and is a wonderful little girl. We are glad to know her (and all of the Sowell clan). :)
Post a Comment