We had the neighbor girl over tonight. She's the daughter of the neighbor that I wrote about a couple of times right here in this old blog and I'm too lazy to put a link to the old posts. Anyway, she and I have become pretty good friends because she does my hair and she's nice (if not brutally honest) and she's pregnant so I feel like I've gotten my justice. Anyway, her daughter (the only child thus far) came over and bossed my little girl around for a few hours. These are some things I noticed while they did crafts at the kitchen table and before all hell broke loose in my house.
-She and Lilly were calling everything fabu, as in short for fabulous. For example, they were painting these little dog statue things and Lilly would say, "Oh, black ears would be so fabu" and then the girl would say, "Totally fabu." And then I thought, "Wow, like gag me with a spoon this kitchen is a hot mess."
-Poor Abe really can be super annoying when other kids come over (who am I kidding? it's not just when friends come over) but no one gets to tell him to knock it off except me. So when Abe was making a high pitched humming noise just because the neighbor girl told him to stop cause it was giving her a headache. I had to step in and say (I was pretty nice about it) but I said, "Hey, (insert proper name here), this is ABE's house." And then I told him to stop cause it was annoying but she got the picture.
-Then again, Abe started copying everything the neighbor girl said and so she said:
NG: Why does he copy everything?
Lilly: Just to learn.
Lilly said that so matter of fact that I thought it was cute.
-Then when I was doing a load of laundry I heard this conversation:
NG: You know in Kindergarten a boy kissed me.
Lilly: Ewwww.
NG: But he doesn't tell the truth cause everytime I ask him if he has a crush on me he says no and runs away.
Lilly: What's a crush?
I LOVE that Lilly didn't know what a crush was. Who needs boys at this age?
Then things started to deteriorate when Abe pulled his undies down and started dancing around while the poor neighbor girl covered her eyes and I chased him around. He's quite a squirmy kid especially when you're one handed (i.e. holding Oliver). I gave him a quick talking to and must remember to now have the "we keep our clothes on when there's company" talk. Then, the neighbor girl's mom came to pick her up and stayed to chat for a bit, so while I fed the baby she sliced up some pumpkin bread for the kids. Then Abe got into some paints and I tried to get him to leave them alone but since I was feeding the baby he thought he could get away with it. So when he saw me get up he booked it down the hallway with a loaded paint brush and I (still holding Oliver) ran after him all the while my neighbor watched me from the couch trying to reign in my boy. There's nothing like trying to discipline your child in front of someone. She took the baby for me while I then dealt with Abe. After that, when I was only slightly embarrassed by my boy's behavior, she excused herself to use the bathroom and I hear Abe knocking on the bathroom door asking who's in there. I tell him to go use the bathroom upstairs when I noticed he's got a suspiciously low sagging pair of underwear on. My boy crapped his pants. (Sorry for the crude wording mother, but at this point that's the best way to describe it) I was so annoyed and marched him upstairs to clean him up. I sent Lilly downstairs to get a garbage bag realizing that my poor neighbor was in the bathroom that had no soap in it cause Abe likes to unscrew the lids and poor the soap down the sink, and he was also the last one to use it so I had no idea what kind of shape it was in. So, I get Abe into the bath and I wash him off with cold water. It's my form of punishment I guess when the kids have "poopy" accidents. It worked for Lilly when she was potty training so I tried it with Abe tonight (by the way, he is potty trained and has been for awhile) but felt a little guilty so I finished the bath with warm water. But Abe looks at me with a big smile and says, "I like the cold water." Ahhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!
I finally get downstairs and see my neighbor wiping off my table. After thanking her I quickly tried to tidy up a few things and my neighbor (quickly climbing the good neighbor list) starts to vacuumn the crumbs under my table. I told her she didn't have to but she did and I let her and I put another load of laundry in.
Then the girls put on these weird little girl plays that they think are hilarious and you have to laugh but it makes no sense and they're certainly not funny.
And then they left. Then I got the kids in bed and then I started on this ridiculously long blog post. Is anyone even reading it? It probably doesn't seem like a crazy night, but it was absolute chaos and now I'm going to bed. Good night.




3 comments:
I'm reading and sorry if I laughed a little too. Sometimes things are humorous when they are all too familiar. I hope you sleep well!
I just love your posts, they make me laugh and want to cry for you:)
Can. Not. Stop. Laughing!
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