Why I Call All Teenagers Hooligans

Because they do stupid things like repeatedly ring your doorbell at four in the morning which happened to us this very day. We could hear the nerds walking around the street outside our house and I ran downstairs to give them a piece of my rattled mind when Kelly piped up with the voice of reason. After all, his beloved car was parked outside in the driveway and we certainly wouldn't want angry hooligans to retaliate while the car was so exposed. Whatever. If they do it again, though, I doubt they'll ever see something as scary as a pregnant woman who already doesn't get good enough sleep chasing after them with a woofle ball bat. I'll keep you posted.

Acrobats

This is Abe doing a trick with his dad.

This is Lilly doing a trick with her dad. Look at that form.

This is Abe and Lilly trying to do a trick but the poor girl could only muster some grunts and strained facial muscles while she tried to lift our boy up.

Some things are better left up to dad.

Dear Baby...

This is your big sister, Lilly. She's so excited for you to come and is really hoping you're a girl. I reassure her, however, that even if you're a boy, by the time you're old enough to pull her hair and bite her, she'll also be older and bigger and will be able to defend herself. I think she's going to
be a big help when you get here and I know she's going to want to be like a little mom to you although when I asked she said she wasn't going to change your diaper. We'll see about that.
Lilly's quite accomplished, you know. She lost her 5th tooth yesterday and although she wanted a small stuffed animal from the tooth fairy, she proclaimed with a big smile (albeit toothless) that she was satisfied with her dollar. She's also developing such a love of reading. After receiving the first few books out of the Magic Tree House series for her birthday and reading them together, she read the fourth installment completely on her own and all in one day. She's since finished the 5th and is onto the 6th. Soon we'll be able to discuss Tolstoy and Austen and I'll probably learn a few things from her.
The countdown has begun and we're excited to see you Baby!

With love,
your mom

Equal Rights

Like his dad, Abe loves motorcycles and points them out to me wherever he sees them. Today at Target he saw one parked outside and this is the conversation that ensued:

Abe: Where's the guy? (meaning the driver of the motorcycle)

Quinne: It could be a girl.

Abe: No, where's the guy?

Quinne: It could be a girl. Girls drive motorcycles, too.

Abe: (upset) No, guys drive motorcycles. Girls ride bicycles.

I didn't relent, but I obviously wasn't getting through. Then later Abe spots a motorcycle slowly driving by and I point out, to my great satisfaction, that it was a girl driving the motorcyle. Then Abe says, defiantly, "I don't see it"

There was nothing left to say

Dear Baby...

I'm starting to waddle.

With love,
your mom

p.s. Your dad painted your room yesterday but it wasn't the right color (to me). He's being a real champ and will repaint it when I find the right color. He said he'll only paint it one more time so I have to be sure about it this time. Too much pressure!

Getting It Right

The other night Abe called me daddy. Unfortunately this isn't the first time and I'm becoming a bit paranoid that I look like a man (perhaps with a very large beer belly). Anywho, I told him that I'm his mom and then I asked him, "Do you know my name?" And then he said something very profound and accurate and said that my name is
"THE BOSS"

Photo of Abe taken by Abe

Quote of the Day

This quote comes from a bald camp director at the rec center where I work out.

Wow! You look like you're ready to pshhhhhhhhh [his hands errupt from his core in an outward motion].

I'm trying to convey that he meant explode.

Thanks, you ignoramus